As I listened to the dilemmas you present here, the feeling I got was that we all just do the best we can as friends and helpers. It's very hard to tell what a person really needs because every one of us is different. I think offering to help or sharing what might be helpful even if it isn't quite right is always better than not saying or doing anything at all. If I were to say to you, "let's go out and do such and such" when I know that you are stressed and broke, am I helping or adding to your stress? What is best to ask in a situation like that? There are a number of ways to blow it in relationships, but I believe it's always better to try and fail than not try at all. I do believe in letting people feel what they are feeling unless what they are feeling is not realistic or healthy. Grief is something we all do differently for sure and often we say the wrong things, but again, I would rather have a well-meaning someone say something wrong than not try at all. All I know to do is pray for them, be sensitive and kind in what I say to them, and offer grace to myself and others who don't get it quite right.
I'm really burdened about my mom. She fell 2 weeks ago and got hurt bad. Moved her from Hospital to Rehab Center 2 days ago but she is no better. She is extremely confused where she hit her head so hard. Immediate family is just her and myself. I need prayer that I won't be selfish in my own prayers. I am staying in Virginia and traveling back to Tennessee for a day or so.
Donny, as I watched and listened to all the questions, like you each of us needs to evaluate what we do or how we treat one another or even ourselves. For me, I can’t control someone else’s feelings, actions, or behavior. I do my best to respect and accept however someone feels for whatever they’re going through. Towards the end when you asked the question, how do respond when we make a mistake. Do we ask God why or do we allow Him to guide us through the challenge? I trust God will lead me through the challenge and He’ll teach me what I’m to learn from it. I trust He’s teaching me so I can grow spiritually, etc. All I can promise is to do my best. When I mess up, I will come before God to confess and repent for my error to be forgiven. I will also do my best to be there for others in the capacity they need whether it be by prayer or just listening. Take care and God bless you and everyone within this community.
Donny, again thank you for 'Food for Thought'. Though I don't have many friends, I think we do feed off each other. I'm currently preparing for lent and I retreat into my interior self to learn about what I have learned and reflect upon it. I am usually the person that is lost for words to give comfort. I feel deeply their sorrow, sadness, frustration and/or anger and I don't know what to say or do. Dumbstruck. I am still learning and your thoughts and questions is definitely something I am going to use for my lent time. Fasting, prayer and self examination 🧐.
Donny ~ I try walking in other's shoes before judging or giving advice. I'm a major talker so I have to work on being a Listener because that's what people basically need. When I was getting my counseling degree, they told me to stop talking so much. That was a stake to the heart. Ha! I think God is like that -- He listen, sends love and gives us the freewill to figure things out for ourselves. Good things to think about today. Thanks, Jan xoxo
When people come looking for me, am that rare woman they find who is different than anyone else they have ever met before. You see I will never change my personality to be someone am not, I'm rarely too old to worry about whether people like me or not in this world. It's their decision to make not mine. I have more important things to do, and life goes on whether they're in it or not for me. Accountability is important to me; because nobody is perfect, but there are people in this world that like to flip the switch on anything you do to shake up your confidence and strong core values and work ethics to get a reaction out of you for not being available to them 24/7. I'm a great listener, and I allow people to talk, which can reveal a lot about that person, especially their body language. But what they don't see is how much you do for them, they only see what you don't do, and you'll never going to satisfied them because they don't hold themselves accountable for the mistakes they've made in their life, but they are quick to blames others for their misfortune. It's like looking in the mirror and seeing someone you don't like, but you still have to love that person who is you, Beautiful, Strong and Brave because you are still here.
When I was young I was extremely shy. I would often relate to animals as ways to find relationships that didn’t hurt. My first dog brought me out of that shyness and I’m very grateful he did. God used them to help me out. I recognized easily when people didn’t like me. I don’t believe I have tried to manipulate people I just accept. When people have sadness I don’t know how to help but I know how to pray. I’ve lost a lot and been rejected a whole bunch which makes me stand back and be unsure about myself and things. Rejection is one of the hardest things to overcome. You don’t know often what to do with people you really care about. Thanks for the kind words.
Donny just wanted to let you know that I really enjoyed the prayer walk and wanted you to know that I am praying for you always 🙏 cause what you do means alot to me and helps me to check my self and how I do things wish I could help you financially but I am barely getting by myself but I am praying for you always 🙏🙏 please pray for me I got more health problems going on with me and I guess a lot of them come from my lupus but anyway I know GOD is in control but I do know that he says that when one or two people come together to pray that he will be there 🙏🙏 Thank you for all your prayers 🙏 ❤️
Thank you so much for this walk! I always look forward to hearing you speak, your thoughts on things and the questions that you ask. When I have a quiet moment, I ask the same questions to myself to see what the answer will be. I truly appreciate these prayer walks and thank you for being something I look forward to watching. It’s been a roller coaster ride for me as well for the last few years, so this shines a light on all that darkness, be well and take care :)
I do free things with my friends like going to yoga at church kid free on Wednesday afternoon. I’m a Mom, so I really have to assess a situation quickly. If a kid falls down, I will comfort them if it’s major like they need stitches or it looks like they broke a bone. I have three boys, so I have seen all sorts of crazy accidents. The biggest thing to do with a hurt child or anyone else in pain is to sometimes simply listen. As humans we are quick to react and we want everything in a state of equilibrium so we try to fix things. Instead, just listen and ask if the person wants you to help them or just listen possibly? With kids, you have to decide what to do after you listen a good portion of the time. With adults, as hard as it can be, sometimes you have to ask them if they want help or just someone to listen.
As for canceled plans or those that don’t occur, sorry to hear about that.
Thank you for another interesting and thoughtful walk. As a teacher in todays's crazy world one of the most upsetting things that I see is what we call in education "lawnmower" parents. They want to mow down every obstacle in their child's path. The frustrating part about this is that we are raising kids who do not know how to fall and get back up on their own.
One lesson we tried to instill in our own boys was - life will knock you down, you have to have the willpower to stand back up on your own. My youngest son was diagnosed with Type I diabetes when he was 12. His life changed forever that day, he had to learn to take care of himself for literally his own survival. As parents we supported and helped him navigate a new normal, but we also made him figure out how to do this on his own. When he was diagnosed and in the hospital we had many friends try to offer comfort and though it was appreciated we found quickly like you, that we were suddenly excluded "because of all you are dealing with". It was something we came to terms with, but we would have loved a dinner with friends or a conversation that did not revolve around a diagnosis.
One statement I heard over and over was "well it could be worse"... yes, it could be. But, a friend said to me - that "yes, it could be worse, but for your family this is devastating." This statement allowed me to take comfort in the fact that -I didn't need people to tell me to be thankful, I needed to be able to process this change in my own way. After we adjusted to our new normal, I found myself approaching others with a different perspective. I realized that there were so many times in the past that I did exactly what others did to us. Today, I try to make sure that when I say "let's get together" we get together! I know in my heart I am a better friend and person for this, and for that I am grateful.
I don.t try to contor amyone.ore change how they feel. Hanging out with two of my friends I like to hang out with.one works alot the other busy takeing care of her mom now who got demita.i sit back and waite for then to ask me to do something
As I listened to the dilemmas you present here, the feeling I got was that we all just do the best we can as friends and helpers. It's very hard to tell what a person really needs because every one of us is different. I think offering to help or sharing what might be helpful even if it isn't quite right is always better than not saying or doing anything at all. If I were to say to you, "let's go out and do such and such" when I know that you are stressed and broke, am I helping or adding to your stress? What is best to ask in a situation like that? There are a number of ways to blow it in relationships, but I believe it's always better to try and fail than not try at all. I do believe in letting people feel what they are feeling unless what they are feeling is not realistic or healthy. Grief is something we all do differently for sure and often we say the wrong things, but again, I would rather have a well-meaning someone say something wrong than not try at all. All I know to do is pray for them, be sensitive and kind in what I say to them, and offer grace to myself and others who don't get it quite right.
Glad for another one of your prayer walks. I would really appreciate prayers for a situation I am currently going through.
Of course Kathy, how can I/we pray for you?
I'm really burdened about my mom. She fell 2 weeks ago and got hurt bad. Moved her from Hospital to Rehab Center 2 days ago but she is no better. She is extremely confused where she hit her head so hard. Immediate family is just her and myself. I need prayer that I won't be selfish in my own prayers. I am staying in Virginia and traveling back to Tennessee for a day or so.
I am praying for you both
Thank you so much for your prayers.
I’ve been where you are with my brother. I’m praying now for your mom.
Appreciate your prayers
Donny, as I watched and listened to all the questions, like you each of us needs to evaluate what we do or how we treat one another or even ourselves. For me, I can’t control someone else’s feelings, actions, or behavior. I do my best to respect and accept however someone feels for whatever they’re going through. Towards the end when you asked the question, how do respond when we make a mistake. Do we ask God why or do we allow Him to guide us through the challenge? I trust God will lead me through the challenge and He’ll teach me what I’m to learn from it. I trust He’s teaching me so I can grow spiritually, etc. All I can promise is to do my best. When I mess up, I will come before God to confess and repent for my error to be forgiven. I will also do my best to be there for others in the capacity they need whether it be by prayer or just listening. Take care and God bless you and everyone within this community.
Donny, again thank you for 'Food for Thought'. Though I don't have many friends, I think we do feed off each other. I'm currently preparing for lent and I retreat into my interior self to learn about what I have learned and reflect upon it. I am usually the person that is lost for words to give comfort. I feel deeply their sorrow, sadness, frustration and/or anger and I don't know what to say or do. Dumbstruck. I am still learning and your thoughts and questions is definitely something I am going to use for my lent time. Fasting, prayer and self examination 🧐.
Donny ~ I try walking in other's shoes before judging or giving advice. I'm a major talker so I have to work on being a Listener because that's what people basically need. When I was getting my counseling degree, they told me to stop talking so much. That was a stake to the heart. Ha! I think God is like that -- He listen, sends love and gives us the freewill to figure things out for ourselves. Good things to think about today. Thanks, Jan xoxo
When people come looking for me, am that rare woman they find who is different than anyone else they have ever met before. You see I will never change my personality to be someone am not, I'm rarely too old to worry about whether people like me or not in this world. It's their decision to make not mine. I have more important things to do, and life goes on whether they're in it or not for me. Accountability is important to me; because nobody is perfect, but there are people in this world that like to flip the switch on anything you do to shake up your confidence and strong core values and work ethics to get a reaction out of you for not being available to them 24/7. I'm a great listener, and I allow people to talk, which can reveal a lot about that person, especially their body language. But what they don't see is how much you do for them, they only see what you don't do, and you'll never going to satisfied them because they don't hold themselves accountable for the mistakes they've made in their life, but they are quick to blames others for their misfortune. It's like looking in the mirror and seeing someone you don't like, but you still have to love that person who is you, Beautiful, Strong and Brave because you are still here.
When I was young I was extremely shy. I would often relate to animals as ways to find relationships that didn’t hurt. My first dog brought me out of that shyness and I’m very grateful he did. God used them to help me out. I recognized easily when people didn’t like me. I don’t believe I have tried to manipulate people I just accept. When people have sadness I don’t know how to help but I know how to pray. I’ve lost a lot and been rejected a whole bunch which makes me stand back and be unsure about myself and things. Rejection is one of the hardest things to overcome. You don’t know often what to do with people you really care about. Thanks for the kind words.
Donny just wanted to let you know that I really enjoyed the prayer walk and wanted you to know that I am praying for you always 🙏 cause what you do means alot to me and helps me to check my self and how I do things wish I could help you financially but I am barely getting by myself but I am praying for you always 🙏🙏 please pray for me I got more health problems going on with me and I guess a lot of them come from my lupus but anyway I know GOD is in control but I do know that he says that when one or two people come together to pray that he will be there 🙏🙏 Thank you for all your prayers 🙏 ❤️
praying for you now
Thanks 🙏
Thank you so much for this walk! I always look forward to hearing you speak, your thoughts on things and the questions that you ask. When I have a quiet moment, I ask the same questions to myself to see what the answer will be. I truly appreciate these prayer walks and thank you for being something I look forward to watching. It’s been a roller coaster ride for me as well for the last few years, so this shines a light on all that darkness, be well and take care :)
I do free things with my friends like going to yoga at church kid free on Wednesday afternoon. I’m a Mom, so I really have to assess a situation quickly. If a kid falls down, I will comfort them if it’s major like they need stitches or it looks like they broke a bone. I have three boys, so I have seen all sorts of crazy accidents. The biggest thing to do with a hurt child or anyone else in pain is to sometimes simply listen. As humans we are quick to react and we want everything in a state of equilibrium so we try to fix things. Instead, just listen and ask if the person wants you to help them or just listen possibly? With kids, you have to decide what to do after you listen a good portion of the time. With adults, as hard as it can be, sometimes you have to ask them if they want help or just someone to listen.
As for canceled plans or those that don’t occur, sorry to hear about that.
Thank you for another interesting and thoughtful walk. As a teacher in todays's crazy world one of the most upsetting things that I see is what we call in education "lawnmower" parents. They want to mow down every obstacle in their child's path. The frustrating part about this is that we are raising kids who do not know how to fall and get back up on their own.
One lesson we tried to instill in our own boys was - life will knock you down, you have to have the willpower to stand back up on your own. My youngest son was diagnosed with Type I diabetes when he was 12. His life changed forever that day, he had to learn to take care of himself for literally his own survival. As parents we supported and helped him navigate a new normal, but we also made him figure out how to do this on his own. When he was diagnosed and in the hospital we had many friends try to offer comfort and though it was appreciated we found quickly like you, that we were suddenly excluded "because of all you are dealing with". It was something we came to terms with, but we would have loved a dinner with friends or a conversation that did not revolve around a diagnosis.
One statement I heard over and over was "well it could be worse"... yes, it could be. But, a friend said to me - that "yes, it could be worse, but for your family this is devastating." This statement allowed me to take comfort in the fact that -I didn't need people to tell me to be thankful, I needed to be able to process this change in my own way. After we adjusted to our new normal, I found myself approaching others with a different perspective. I realized that there were so many times in the past that I did exactly what others did to us. Today, I try to make sure that when I say "let's get together" we get together! I know in my heart I am a better friend and person for this, and for that I am grateful.
Always enjoy your prayer walk program
I don.t try to contor amyone.ore change how they feel. Hanging out with two of my friends I like to hang out with.one works alot the other busy takeing care of her mom now who got demita.i sit back and waite for then to ask me to do something
Great questions Donny. Love and prayers.